Soo my heart, it just decides to do what it wants. A friend once told me that, the heart wants what it wants. True to the fact,it will do anything to get what it wants,even if it means deceiving, manipulating, or using evil ways to get what it wants.
My Bible tells me,the heart is a deceiver,it tells me how evil it is. So I wonder,is it deceiving me to fall for this guy? Or should I say be in love with this guy,what would be wrong with love? I don’t think the heart is deceiving me when it tells me that this guy loves me,or when my emotions get the better part of me,or when i have to lie to “protect” the one’s I love,or when it tells me,follow your heart Diana. Follow me.
So I go back to God,on my knees, asking Him,how can You tell me that my heart is a deceiver,that it is evil and dangerous? I don’t see anything dangerous in all the things that my heart has led me to do,infact.. They are such a success that I believe it when they tell me to follow my heart. So instead of listening to You God,I choose not to heed on Your word,I choose not to listen to what You have to say about everything that my heart has led me to,that seem very successful. I come,tell You everything that’s in my heart,thank You and shooo, I go.
Until one day,everything that my heart led me to,crumbles literally,every area of my life that the heart led me to,goes down. It shames me,it hurts me,it pains me. Ouch! Ouch! I run to You,and ask You ,”Why God?” “Whyyyyyyyy?”, and I cry the whole night,trying to comprehend what just happened,how did it come to this? How did all that seemed to be such a success without a doubt,just suddenly break? Becomes nothing,becomes useless and shameful?. How now?
Eventually,I stop crying when I hear Your calm voice speak to me,and You remind me of all that You told me about the heart in Your word,You remind me of it’s form- the heart,and it reminds every detail,and wouhh. I realize,I never really wanted to listen to You,to obey,to follow,I never really wanted Your input in matters concerning the things of my heart. With my ignorance I followed my heart as they told me- them that have not hidden Your word in their hearts, them that do not want to seek Your heart,them is also me, who barely even gave You a priority in my life,especially my heart. So I did,I worked,and I walked in a cliche of Salvation. A relationship with that I did not nature at all.
But here I am today ,at Your feet again,In Your presence,crying out my heart to You,literally giving my heart to You,that You may change it,transform it,and so faithfully deal with it until all it wants is You oh Lord. You.
May my heart,cry to You. May my heart seek after God’s own heart. May You oh Lord,teach me to Guard my heart in You,with Your word. That all the issues of life that will flow from it,will be not for self but for the Honor and Glory of Your Name Abba Father. May my heart reflect the beauty of Your eternal,unconditional,complete Love. May my heart want all that is of You ,that I may live a life of abundance,a peaceful and fulfilling life according to Your perfect will for me.
My heart,follow God. Don’t follow yourself. ❤💕